Black Girl Lost

Prop 1:

I heard about it. Saw it on 20/20 or some-show similar. Something about the effects of Evangelical Christendom on West Africa. Perhaps, perhaps not. But at the end of the day, the result was the same: Sisters lightening their skin. I was like "Damn. This is like 199x." And here the devil was up to his old tricks, still catching Black people out there. Serving self-hate in a bottle.

But for real-for real... watching it... there was this sense of... that's over there. You know the whole dual consciousness thing. Seeing Black people. Acknowledging that they're Black. But at the same time holding something back because who besides Michael Jackson wants to be white! So sitting back in 199x, watching that shit, I rationalized, and those Africans became "dem niggas over there" because they were nothing like these niggas right here.

Then again...

In the inbetween time from that day in 199x to December 16, 2005 I have borne witness to Lil' Kim, Destiny's Child, Wendy Williams, varying video "vixens", bleached skinned West Africans and I have to ask the question, "What's up with Black women?"

"Good and bad hair... Good and bad hair" was the chorus sung in Spike Lee's School Daze. And what made it funny and easier to enjoy was that I, hopefully we, could sit back and say "Yeah. it used to be like that."

Growing up, my Mother had an Afro. A big one. It extended from her face like the rays of the sun. You know light travels in waves, right? Saturday mornings or afterschool, Black girls on steps braiding each others hair- now that's really hood! True, perms and other forms of straightnin' have been around and will stay around. But natural was preferred and respected, because even if it was permed it was still yours and that made it ok. We had come a long you and I. Black is beautiful, Black Pride, I'm Black and I'm proud (say it loud!)... I'm talking about the Black women's lack of confidence in her looks.

I think it started when the Black Man became a sex symbol. Denzel was the world's sexiest man. Remember that? White women drooling over Michael Jordan. When D'Angelo's last album came out. The writer called him "sex on a stick". Sex on a stick? 50 years ago he would have been lynched for that! And the hits keep coming... Fresh Prince, Tupac, Kobe, Nelly, Andre3K, 50Cent, Pharell... Niggaz have gone international! Back in the day, Black men were the exclusive property of Black women. However, globalization has brought the original man into the sight lines of white, Asian, and Latino women. In a real way. Its weird. When I was in high school there was this unspoken divide. The racial lines were drawn and highly respected. That girl over there was cute and that's about how far it went. Yeah, you had the occasional Black-Latino cross-pollination, but now? All you can eat baby, believe it. And where has that left Black women? Hanging. Figuring out how to stay in the game. So metaphoricaly speaking we have Little Kim, buying a nose, boobies, lips and God knows what else. Destiny's Black Child Lost Beyonce is so Barbi-fied that in some photos I can barely tell if she's Black. Maybe that's the most nefarious point. To make Black women as "white" as possible in order to reflect white women as well as Black. So Beyonce can sell to Shameeka in Southeast DC as well as Britany in Provo. To TJ in Detroit and Luke in Spokane, because white men don't really like Black women. What they want is Barbie. Brittany Spears, Jessica Simpson, you know... Barbie. How can a Sister be Barbie? So, Oprah rocks hair pieces. Eve and Mary J. rock the Rupunzelle (spellcheck). And the Williams sisters are the Williams sisters. Then when I'm on the self check out line at the store, colored lens of green, light brown, and blue stare at me from the cover of so-called "Black hair" mags. Skin powdered white, bright red lips, too much blush... it's a sick sad joke. "Good and bad hair..." Even Lauren Hill rocks a John, Paul, Ringo, George mop-top. Miseducated indeed. There was an optimism with Vanessa Williams and Halle Berry. But there's a caveat. In reality they're no different than Mariah and if they were a little lighter then maybe they'd be Mariah. And how is this manifested in the every day? Look around you tell me. And time will tell us all.

... Maybe that's the most nefarious point. To make Black women as "white" as possible in order to reflect white women as well as Black. So Beyonce can sell to Shameeka in Southeast DC as well as Britany in Provo. To TJ in Detroit and Luke in Spokane...

Salam